the note

Theresa, 

Keep trusting

keep believing

keep hanging on

to Him. 

I’ve received a few notes in my day, in grade school, my friend Mary and I, like many children before us (and after) passed notes to each other to stave off boredom. We’d write little anecdotes about the teacher, or what someone was wearing, and later, as we got older, we’d find dead flies, and include them in the notes to each other with epithets. 

I’ve gotten a few love notes too, mostly when I was younger, and statistically, an inordinate amount when I was in Europe, when I was young. Strange young boys and men would hand you a scrap of paper that said, “call me” with a scribbled number on it, or “meet me here later” or “you are beautiful.” Silly notes that you didn’t take seriously.  All in all, notes are sort of a lovely thing you can hang onto and look at every so often and cherish. It’s been too long since I’ve gotten one. 

Today, I decided to clean out my makeup box, and at the bottom, covered in blush, and eyeliner and sparkly stuff, barely legible, I found a note, a note I’ve been toting with me for years now, the note that someone sent along with some cash, I’m not even sure of the amount now, when I was a young and struggling single mom. It meant so much, at the time, and whenever I was discouraged, I would read it and take heart. Someone understood, someone cared. Now that I look at it, I can see that it wasn’t just words, or a Bible verse; it was personal and it was tangible, especially as it was sent with some badly needed money. 

As I thought about this note, it seemed a bit ironic, after my posting just yesterday, about not being sure about what to believe in anymore, about becoming more logical, and being ok with it, that I was brought back again to the um, spiritual.  But as I read this note over again to myself this morning, it was the message it sent that has stuck with me, if nothing else, the “keep hanging on” part. Who can’t relate to that? Who doesn’t remember a time of being so overwhelmed and so alone that all we could do was hang on? 

What this note did, was it affirmed my situation, the person (still unknown) who sent it was saying, “I see your need, and I understand, and here’s what I can offer.” And I think that is what faith is for many, when they offer it as the best thing in their life, it is. For some, their relationship with God, or whatever deity they profess, is their lifeline, it is their hope. I had to throw the note away, it was too messy and yucky to hang onto anymore. But this note that for years I had tucked into my bedroom mirror, has traveled with me, a talisman, through raising my daughters, and through my move back home to Minneapolis. May the person who sent it be blessed a hundred fold.