Marketing & Manipulation

The last tomato I bought was not just a tomato. It was an heirloom tomato, purchased at a high price at the co-op, of all places. It may or may not have been locally grown (which is relative to say, Minnesota, the US, or the globe). What I do know, is that I never, ever would have imagined that a grocery staple, like a tomato, would be priced at what I would consider, a luxury item price. I did not buy it because it was pricey, or heirloom. I bought it because it looked like the freshest produce. 

My bag of coffee is not just a bag for coffee anymore, it’s not just a ‘container.’ It is a place for marketing. It tells me, “Light or Dark, it’s all green.” And I’m thinking, yeah, right. Green. Unless there is something less than savory going on in food production, why would I need to be assured that my coffee is green? In the wisdom of Shakespeare, I think, “Thou dost protest too much.” I want to pick my coffee on taste, not politics. Especially not corporate politics. I worked at a major chain coffee shop, and I saw just how green it was. For the corporate folks, of  course. They may have no guilt, for they have spread it all around to the rest of us, subtly, of course, by assuring us that we should have no guilt, in buying their products. 

I don’t know for how long it’s been going on, but marketing attempts to manipulate our emotions are rampant. Maybe you know that, maybe you don’t. I think about it when I see green, as in; our products, store, manufacturing, etc. are green. I know enough about manufacturing and the world in general to know how very little control we have about each step that goes into harvesting, making, and shipping goods. This doesn’t mean that some companies might not take more care, be more in control, and offer products that might be more sustainable than others, but I would ask, what does exactly green mean? Are there standards attached to this new color word for political and social beliefs? 

And in the case of something like say, new construction, might re-using an older building actually be the most green? But we often don’t like to do our homework, to look into what green actually means in advertising, in the industry and in this organization, precisely. We take people at their word, and if green means sustainable, we buy, even if it means that rain forests are destroyed, and the trucks moving the product are using up petrol and emitting pollution. After all, they’ve covered the bases for us, haven’t they? Isn’t that what their brochures say? (While actually, all this paper, printing, and advertising, are too, using up more resources.)

Green isn’t the only place that we are manipulated by advertising; how about the strange concept that you are saving money when you are actually, (yes, really) spending your money? How can you both save and spend, at the same time. And I will admit, I get ‘tricked’ into this, because, sometimes, I forget, that money is nothing unless I spend it. Sometimes I still believe that I can (and will) only make a set amount of money, and so I better be careful, instead of believing that I do have enough and can keep making more. 

So, what does this have to do with me (or us) in general? Well, sometimes I just wonder if all this marketing aimed at manipulating our emotions has made us wary of having emotions? If it is so easy for someone else to take advantage of me because I have emotions, why do I have them? Maybe I should hide them away, behind defense mechanisms, maybe? And if everywhere I go on the street, I get conflicting emotions and people might just try to see me as vulnerable, how do I navigate? 

First, I think we have to remember that our lives, including our emotions, including our cold hard cash, are our own. We don’t have to live our lives, or feel our feelings, or spend (or save) our money for anything except ourselves. I’ll say it again, our feelings are our own, for us. Our emotions are fantastical ways that we figure out what we like, and what we don’t like, they help us become who we are. There are no bad and good feelings in terms of ethics or morals, just feelings. What we do with our feelings may have consequences, how we manage how we feel may have lesser or greater social (and personal) consequences, but that is separate from how we feel. 

I’m watching an older British TV show lately, Reggie Perrin, (with Martin Clunes, who is adorable) and on the show, when Reggie’s mom makes him crazy, he ‘hallucinates’ as he calls it, that a wrecking ball mows her down. (This might actually be more representative of how Reggie feels inside, that his mom is oblivious to him and doesn’t see it.) We all laugh, though, because we know that we have not evolved to the place where Reggie can articulate his feelings and act on them in a way to protect himself; and so he imagines a horrible way to get rid of his mother, and most likely, the wrecked feeling inside of himself. 

Maybe we don’t want to see the many ways in which we are manipulated, are not exactly who we want to be, and our helplessness at times, in living in such a complicated world. Maybe. But also, just maybe, we can learn to accept our feelings, and integrate them into our lives, and so then, we can address our shadow selves, personally and communally, knowing that we share responsibility for letting ourselves be manipulated, by marketing, by politics, by ourselves, and each other. So that when you buy that cup of coffee, you know, that many coffee growing communities don’t enjoy the same quality of life that you do, when you buy green, huge corporations are still stripping forests, and when you spend money, that’s simply what you are doing. 

But, it is also maybe OK that people in another part of the world live differently, what you have in that car you are driving (convenience, esteem, mobility), they may have in higher levels of endorphins, because they live with family members (happiness, community, acceptance). And maybe, corporations that are motivated by greed, won’t succeed in the long run, maybe they will, and this shows us that we still accept colonialism and makes us think, What do we need to do about this? And spending your money, you could save it, yes, you get to do what you want with your money. Really, you get to do with your money what you will, and you know what? You get to do with your life what you will also. Your emotions will kick in in regards to your internalized belief system, but just remember, you will most likely be always wanting to feel accepted, and also to have some autonomy. 

And maybe, when we learn to understand our own emotions better, and give ourselves a vocabulary around them, we will no longer need to resort to defense mechanisms to protect ourselves or our self-concept. We won’t have to hallucinate graphically our inner world. Instead, we could become more solid in who we are, how things are, and be accepting of it all. 

The Master's House

Just a few pages until the end of Living My Life, and I came upon this line, It was torture to remain neutral where the line between masters and men were so sharply drawn, or to stand by idly while the leaders were making one blunder after another; nor would I leave by rail or ship manned by strike-breakers (p. 551). I had one of those aha moments where I wondered if the very concept of leadership lends itself to supporting the patriarchal,  hierarchical culture we live in. 

Maybe this is why I’ve rankled in every single leadership course I’ve ever taken. Even though we have created the concept of servant leadership, even though we have mindful leadership (of which I’m more a fan of), aren’t all forms of leadership a way of perpetuating as Goldman so aptly puts it, the line between masters and men. What, I would ask, does this line (innocuous as it sounds) represent? At the same time I have to admit that I’ve never before seen the connection between the words master, as leader, and the term master’s degree and the term master, as in master/slave. 

Feminist Audre Lorde wrote a paper entitled, The Master's Tools Will Never Dismantle the Master's House, from Sister Outsider, The Crossing Press Feminist Series (1984). I’ve used this metaphor in the past in trying to talk about how many of the theories of marriage and family therapy still perpetuate male dominance, patriarchy, and colonialism. Once again I am reminded that there’s not just one discipline in which we are steeped in the constructs of the past. Yet it continues for me to be a struggle to dismantle this house, for many of us still are trying to find shelter there. 

So, as we prepare leaders for the future, we are, by the very nature of using the word leader, perpetuating a myth. The myth that men are measurable, and rankable, and that some will end up on the wanting side of the line. I close with these lines from Lorde’s paper, The Master's Tools Will Never Dismantle the Master's House, from Sister Outsider, The Crossing Press Feminist Series (1984): 

As women, we have been taught either to ignore our differences, or to view them as causes for separation and suspicion rather than as forces for change. Without community there is no liberation, only the most vulnerable and temporary armistice between an individual and her oppression. 

Emma Goldman and The Law of Attraction

I am nearing the end of the 550 page autobiography of Emma Goldman, Living My Life. It ranks up there as a book that has enlightened and intrigued me in many areas; politics, ideology, history, geography, even, the Law of Attraction. A supporter of Emma was Helen Keller, how interesting is that? In 1919, Emma and her longtime friend (ideologic partner) Alexander Berkman were deported to Russia, where her ideals were sorely tried and tested. It begged of her the question, How do ideals measure up to the messiness of life? 

In her beloved Russia, the place she had hoped to be, to be a part of the revolution, the starvation and hypocrisy she found in city after city, made her feel, as though “caught in a trap” (p. 485). I think it is a place where many of us come to eventually, wondering how our ideals actually play out in our lives. Are we living for a cause, or or we living? Can we balance our beliefs with compassion, and also, can we balance our striving with simply living, being present? The older I get, the more I choose being present, leaving ideologies to others, or perhaps growing into the ideology that the present, and those I love, are the most important things to me.  

It is interesting to think about Emma’s life through the lens of the Law of Attraction. The Law of Attraction is that our thoughts have power and energy and bring about the life we desire. We ‘attract’ into our life what we think about. I believe that Emma’s life is a good indicator of the power of the Law of Attraction. Whether of not her ideology held out for her, whether or not she was able to reconcile her idealistic aspirations with the reality she found in revolutionary Russia, she did travel the world with the power of her thoughts, and of her ideas. 

Emma always had money to bring into her life all that she thought about and hoped to do. At one point, even, as she and Beckman were preparing to travel by train throughout Russia to collect important documents to track the history of the revolution, Emma found herself in the basement storage rooms of the Winter Palace, one of the homes of the recently assassinated Czar. She writes, “Room after room was stacked to the ceiling with utensils and plate, thickly covered with dust, mute witnesses to the glory that was no more. And there I was, rummaging in that magnificence for dishes for our expedition” (p. 453). 

How you might wonder, would an immigrant to America, exiled back to Russia end up looting the Czar’s palace? It is incredible, and I am fascinated by the incredible in life. I am also fascinated by the interplay of belief and our thoughts and actions. It is especially interesting in our materialistic culture to think about the accumulation of wealth. Here is a another quote that speaks to the relative value of material things in our lives, and I think of the necessity of letting things come into our lives, and trusting that we will always have what we need, and especially, what we want; “Everything in life is relative, looming in value according to one’s necessity” (p. 461). 

Emma & Me

I have become fascinated by the life of anarchist Emma Goldman. 

Here’s what Wikipedia has to say about anarchism: Anarchism is often defined as a political philosophy which holds the state to be undesirable, unnecessary, or harmful. However, others argue that while anti-statism is central, it is inadequate to define anarchism.Therefore, they argue instead that anarchism entails opposing authority or hierarchical organization in the conduct of human relations, including, but not limited to, the state system. Proponents of anarchism, known as "anarchists", advocate stateless societies based on non-hierarchical free associations. As a subtle and anti-dogmatic philosophy, anarchism draws on many currents of thought and strategy. Anarchism does not offer a fixed body of doctrine from a single particular world view, instead fluxing and flowing as a philosophy.

I include this definition, in that it is still a state of believing or philosophy that I have a hard time wrapping my head around. Perhaps because of it being subtle, and fluxing, it is not a theory you can easily pin down. Interesting, in that in my questioning and curiosity around systems, I have been asked if I am an anarchist. I smile at this, as if I’d want to say I could be defined by one word, as if anyone could, even, Emma Goldman. I’m reading her autobiography, called Living My Life, and her life, if not her politics, is a roller coaster ride through cities on two continents, from stays in posh hotels, staging and speaking at radical conventions, even to prisons and jails. She is a good writer, and a thoughtful and thought provoking woman, if you can get past her being an accomplice in attempted murder. If anyone is still naive enough to believe that America was built only on beautiful Christian ideals, and that our current culture is only a degradation of what once was, this book will set them straight. 

Goldman writes; In the latter part of 1909 New York again experienced a vice crusade. The reformers had discovered the white-slave traffic! They got busy, though they were without the slightest notion regarding the sources of the evil they were trying to eradicate (p. 269).

This book is making me think about my own politics, or lack thereof. I struggle with what we can change, and what we can’t and wondering how hard should we work towards ideals we believe in. Should we risk our lives for ideals? Do we really owe our 8 hour work week to those anarchists and union folks who risked and often gave their lives for better working conditions? How do we stand up now to hierarchical workplaces that often tout ideals about equality and diversity but still believe that one person’s job is worth much more money than another’s? How much money is it worth to earn to jeopardize our health and our earth’s health, as in drilling and fracking? How did our earth become a commodity that some are rich off of, and others die for the obtaining of these ‘products’? 

Besides her talks and meetings, Goldman also started an anarchist journal, titled, Mother Earth . It was considered, "A Monthly Magazine Devoted to Social Science and Literature,"  and was edited by Emma Goldman and Alexander Berkman, another well-known anarchist. It’s articles included a variety of topics including; the labor movement, education, literature, the arts, state and government control, and women's emancipation, sexual freedom, and was an early supporter of birth control. Its subscribers and supporters formed a virtual "who's who" of the radical left in the United States in the years prior to 1920. (Wikipedia). 

On this, Mother’s Day, I offer a tribute to my mother earth, sustainer of my life, full of water which ebbs and flows, and like philosophy, like life, like thought, is moving, always. I also offer a tribute to Emma Goldman, who mothers me in my intellectual life, who challenges me to think, and who fearlessly chronicled history in a way that no text book ever could have. 

i am a garden

lush dark soil

turned

and turned again

soaking up the sun

soaking up the rain

open to seeds

sprouting within

growing 

producing

energy

that vibrates

with healing

producing abundant

blooms

fragrant and soothing

step inside

rest and be renewed

for the journey

inward

tilling your own

fertile ground